May 2012
29 posts
3 tags
Wait what?
Zoe: Fuck this wind off!
Me: Fuck your face off!
Me: Wait...
Zoe: You can't say that...
4 tags
Just wanted to let you know that I read this story a while ago and as an...
– ChantelPereira (on my story ‘Blink’)
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I feel like I wouldn’t even love my own child as much as I love that show.
– Me (about Game Of Thrones)
8 tags
Fairchild.
This is a rap song I wrote to express how I feel about my friend Fairchild. I’m particularly proud of the third verse. Let’s battle already Kanye!
Fairchild, ya make a brother go wild,
Ya got all ma documents filed,
My love fo you, that shit ain’t mild,
Throw you on the floor, make a love child.
Fairchild, motherfucker,
Damn you betta pucker,
Or I’ll fuck you like a...
5 tags
Bulletproof condom, when I’m in these hoes. Got staples on my dick, why?...
– Kanye West (in Illest Motherfucker Alive)
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10 tags
Awesome Things That I Learnt Tonight
Here are just some of the wonderful things I learnt tonight (what an excellent night it was!). In no particular order:
Fairchild is not Fairchild’s first name.
Listening to movie soundtracks at a party is cool.
I would totally have sex with an android, especially if it looked like Zooey Deschanel.
Horse heads are cool, and Andy Green is the horse master.
Being overtired and being...
5 tags
Kate told me a very funny joke today.
She said that Nadal had been knocked out in the first round of a clay-court masters tournament. N00b. I lol’d so hard.
3 tags
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The Document Wallet Masta, That's Me!
Picked up an assignment from uni the other day. Didn’t care much for the mark or the assignment, so I did what any self-respecting person would do and threw it in the bin (recycling of course, i’m not a savage). However, I was then left with a document wallet. I wasn’t going to carry it around with me because it would have been super annoying and I wasn’t going to throw it...
7 tags
Oh George.
Author George R.R. Martin was asked if he had a resolution or ending to the seemingly endless conflict. He replied that the end would be a cloud of dust or snow being driven by the wind across a vast graveyard full of tombstones.
3 tags
Is that porridge or just oats?
– Me
April 2012
32 posts
12 tags